Project Management Funkymentals

Dorienne, one of our fabulous PPO consultants, went on a training course recently.  She was joined by various team members, and while the others made notes, she doodled a great poem down that I thought was so fun and clever I just had to share it with you here:

Project Management Funkymentals: a poem by Dorienne Barber

Project Management Fundamentals makes our head spin.
Have we grasped the concept?
Let us dive in:

PMBOK® is Best Practice so learn it well –
Do we understand the rest?
Who can tell!

Projects are unique and temporary with four endeavours undertaken.
Use your Ten Knowledge Areas found… in our “traditional weapon”!

Integration, Scope, Time & Cost;
Quality, HR, Comms & Risk;
Procurement & Stakeholders – manage them all.
Code of conduct is key – or we will fall.

Dot your “i’s” and cross your “t’s”;
Remember your “-ings” and this will all be a breeze.

Initiating, Planning, Monitoring & Controlling,
Executing and Closing make up the process of Grouping.
Skills, Knowledge, Tools & Techniques;
Satisfy your Stakeholders – they’re very important peeps!

Risks we foresee,
Issues “is nou ‘n krisis” –
Add Changes to these and they form our Exceptions.

Projectised & Composite;
Matrix & Hierarchical:
These form our PM’s organisational structure.

Portfolios, Programmes and yes, Projects too:
This’s our company’s breakdown of work that we do.

Decomposition is used for WBS –
Subdividing our workload to achieve final success.

PMI, PMO, ROM & Gannt charts –
These are only a few acronyms… Oh! My giddy Aunt!

PI Matrix forms part of Risk Management.
Plan, identify & perform all our analyses.
Qualitative we plot neatly on a scale;
Quantitative we cost – it’s the Rands that prevail.

Accept, Exploit, Enhance & Share:
These are Risk Reponses with a positive flair.
Risk Metalanguage is very important:
“Due to” & “As a result of” forming part of our vocab.

Project Scope Management outlines how we deliver;
This is the sub-plan of our project… All this theory makes us shiver!

Project Objectives are conveyed a “To” (and a verb) –
The Objectives being linked to a Deliverable, we’ve heard.

The Time Management Process is made up of Schedules:
Plan, Define, Sequence & two Estimates.
Develop & Control – again it’s Decomposition.
This will define our activity & decision.

Network Diagramming & Activity on Node:
Sorry Unathi – you lost us, tenfold!

Project Management, folks, is not for the feint hearted;
Follow these processes in order to get started.

Wishing all PM’s well & every success.
Unathi – we thank you – you are the best!

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Gilly Fish

Author: Gilly Fish

Ailurophobic (fear of cats) synchronised swimmer and PPO office culture observer and correspondent, with a passion for Tweeting.

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